“Fruit punch?” I asked.
“No, no. Not for me. Probably has red dye #40 in it. That stuff is banned all over Europe.” As I filled up another for myself, he continued,
“Great party… What are you supposed to be?”
“A news anchor” I answered.
“Ah, I see it. You could also be over dressed… Or- or well suited… or oh! If you had a gavel you could be a lawsuit ”
“I’m a-” And I interrupted.
“A wet blanket, I know.”
Jared Hecht is from Minneapolis. He studies playwriting at DePaul University. Some of his best work can be found on his OkCupid profile.